The Start of a Journal - Destiney

I’m not sure why I decided to keep a journal all of a sudden. In all my years alive on Eorzea I’ve never had a desire before to write down the trivialities of my life. Okay maybe not everything in my life is so trivial. I guess I just feel a bit awkward writing down my life in a book of blank pages. Which is strangely odd for someone who considers herself a scholar.

Anyways… I guess I should get to the point rather then continuing to mindlessly rant on. Before I get well an far from the point of this first entry. An before the night ends with me asleep against these pages. Though I’m sure Lady or Tucker would wake me come morning to be fed.

I’ve never been the most social of people. Not since that day. I guess in a way a withdrew into myself an my books. My Aunt never required I go out an make friends while I lived in Ishgard for those five years. So when I finally did leave I had only Dekkarra to rely upon until I met Chee an the others.

So I’ve taken to following or asking Chee to go places with me lately. A couple of taverns mostly. But even then I end up sticking mostly to Chee an not making much of an effort to make any new friends. I just feel too awkward or nervous to go to most of these places without at least someone I know. How is it I can stand up to foes on the field of battle or fight with people I barely know… Yet I can’t muster the courage to enter a tavern without a crutch of some sort…

So Chee and I went out to Forgotten Springs. She apparently knew some people hosting a small get together out there near the camp. Well since Chee was going I decided I could manage to go. Lady of course nipped at me until I agreed to allow her to tag along with me as well. Most of the gathering was made up of members from a free company called Sword & Rose Order.

We found ourselves a seat in the shade of the dock there among the other people attending. At first I figured it was going to be just another night where I only really interacted with Chee as usual. It was actually far from the truth. Two people, a lovely hyuran midlander lady an a dark skinned elezen, sitting nearby were actually gazing my way. Mostly because of Lady who was flying around my head or perching on my shoulder, wherever she decided she wanted to be at that moment. Fickle dragonet. I wasn’t meaning to eavesdrop on what was being said but apparently Lady was their topic of discussion.

So instead of actually talking much with Chee, she was actually talking with a lady au ra we had met at one of the taverns, I spent most of my evening talking with these two. I felt actually very comfortable talking with these two. They were incredibly nice even if Raiden didn’t fully trust Lady. I can’t say I blame someone who has grown up in the dangers of Ishgard. Aimee however grew up in Gridania like I did before the calamity. Raiden even offered to make a cake sometime. Ugh. Why must I have such a sweet tooth…

An then there was a pretty midlander lady named Adlynn who was passing out flowers. I put them in the vase on the dining table. Much prettier then the black flowers I had there before. I though the yellow an black to represent the Flames was nice at first but black flowers… Felt so much like death…

Anyways… I think I might just have to stop by the Order’s house to visit sometime. If all the members of this place are this nice… Maybe it could be a good step towards being at least a bit more social an a little less… isolated. Now I’m in no way saying my Outsider friends don’t spend time with me or aren’t there when I need them. Quite far from the truth. They are the best kind of friends a girl like myself could ask for. I guess I just want a change of pace. Something new an different. All the expeditions… I guess I’m just worn out.

I look forward to my next crossing of paths with Raiden or Aimee. Or even anyone else of the S&R Order’s members. Right now I’m get myself some rest. After I change out of this summer outfit. Heh. Good night.